Serving food on festival day.

If the meal is served on a banana leaf, the pointed side of the leaf is to be on the left only.
The Deasasthas and Madhvas start serving with salt, on the left hand side, upper portion of the leaf corner salt. Next to it will be Chutney or pickle, then the two koshambaris side by side, then the two Bhajis. These will all be in a row on the upper portion of the leaf. Just below the bhaji is the Raitha. Now on the lower portion of the leaf, right hand corner, will be served the a spoon full of Kheer, a little above it is the varan[salted and seosoned dal], Left hand side corner will be lime rice or any mixed rice. pappad, and ambodey, is on the right hand side upper portion of the leaf. Water glasses are kept to left side of the leaf. After everybody is seated rice is served and then ghee. [It is said one should not eat a meal with out ghee]. After the men have done Chitravathi and said govinda can
all the others members can start to eat. The sambar or kadi whatever the Kaalvan[gravy dish] is served. One has to start by eating the kheer first. After sambar/kadi Saar is served, then the sweet the the kheer, and last is dahi.
Even though i mention sambar, sambar is NOT made on festival days. Kadi/ Pitla or Bisibele bhath is made.
When one has finished eating, if the salt has not been used , one has to pour a little water over it. I think, this is because if any person has eaten, so neatly but, the salt left alone it could be mistaken for a New leaf.
Important point to remember is VADA made out of Udad or Rice flour is NEVER made on festival days. Only ambodais are made, if this is not possible , Bhaji, mangalore bonda or Pkodas using bendi in place of onion is fried.
For festivals like Vralakshmi or Gowri puja or when a Bramin and savashni are invited for any other function, all the family members should wait till the bramin/savashni have started to eat then only can the family members start to eat. Children should be taught the rule from young age.
In many households i find the children and adults, eat with a spoon and without washing their hands serve themselves. Even if one eats with a spoon, it is USHTA[enjalu]. All people dont like this. This has become a trend, after this Buffet system came into Vogue. This is not a good habit. All parents have some ground rules in the family so some system will be followed.
Make it a point , that the full family are all present, for the puja in the family and also for lunch. The women take lot of trouble to cook, it makes her happy if the family partakes the food with word or two appreciating the dishes.
Our ancients had made these rules to keep the togetherness in the family and also the children, grand children all become aware of the customs followed by each individual family and the tradition.
If a bramin couple have been invited for lunch and the food is being served on the floor, before placing the banana leaf clean the floor, and at the place the leaf is to placed , pour a spoonfull of water, and with that water make a square and on that place the leaf. The square drawn out of water is called a Mandal. [ May be this is done so that the leaf stays in place.] Then in front of the leaf, draw a rangoli with haldhi or haldhi mixed with white rangoli. Then the food is served as mentioned at the start of this post.Generally bhaji is served as it is consumed, the mixed rice is served a second time after the sweet is served.Rice is offered before every kalvan [gravy] is served. Even though Kheer is served at the start of a meal, it is again served after the sweet, and a must. NO sweet is served after Dahi,[curds].[This is not a superstition like some think.Sugar as is well known is bad for the teeth.Dahi or butter milk has the good bacteria keep the keep the teeth and mouth clean.]
Some dishes that should not be made on festival days and some vegetables .
Poori and Seekarni[Seekarni is banana mashed to which sugar milk and cardomom is added and mixed]. Karela in any form, Arvi, Raw kela, [though this is used by the desasthas of tanjore], in karnataka this is not used.Soji/rava kesari/sooji halwa is not to be made and also Rava kheer.
Gojju is not made, though in Udupi cooking they make it, desasthas dont.SAmbar is not allowed.Brinjal, snake gourd, bala dhind[inner stem of a banana plant after it has yielded the flower and friut], the avarai that grows on the creeper, in hindi it is called Sem.
Another Sweet which is not made on festivals is Shakra Pongal.